


The Rebel and the Pushover

by orphan_account



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: College AU, F/F, F/M, M/M, Multi, Reference to Drugs, bad life example, crack!fic, don't do drugs kids, please don't read if under 16, rebel!toriel, sort of
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-04
Updated: 2016-04-04
Packaged: 2018-05-31 05:40:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,048
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6458089
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"It's entirely possible she's said the f-word before. There's no knowing. It's one of life's greatest mysteries." - Toby Fox. November 10, 2015.</p><p>Ever wonder what other crazy rebel stuff she got into in her life? Maybe she rode a motorbike? Maybe she sent to sex clubs? Maybe she was totally into baking, and not the kitchen kind.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Rebel and the Pushover

_"It's entirely possible she's said the f-word before. There's no knowing. It's one of life's greatest mysteries." - Toby Fox. November 10, 2015._

“FUCK OFF YOU DIRTY SLUTS!” Two moldsmalls sluggishly crawled away in tears as Toriel flipped them off from her barstool.

“What does this fucking look like, a circus act? Pour me another drink you voyeuristic asshole!” Grillby lifted his brow, unimpressed. He knew Toriel couldn’t hurt him. After all, fire can’t burn fire. He was however, more concerned about a pissed off Toriel scaring away all his customers. So he poured her another shot. Before the last drop settled she swiped it off the bar and knocked it back, sighing at the burn and slamming the glass back on the bar with a satisfying _thud_.

“Thanks Grillbz, just the right amount of burn.” She shrugged on her spiked jacket, no fucks given, as she stumbled out of the bar, kicking over a poor froggit couple’s table on her way out, and slammed the door.

“She’ll make a wonderful mother” Sans noted, as he chugged ketchup from his corner.

-

Asgore was studying a conjoint degree in law and agriculture. He did decently in his classes and had to set a good example. He was leading his people after all. He was also sharing a flat with the campus’ notorious raging bisexual, coke snorting, joint smoking, 24/7 baked hardass highschool dropout Toriel. Asgore tried to negotiate with her, he tried giving her space, and he tried respecting her life choices. He was also absolutely smitten with her. So when she stumbled into their flat utterly shitfaced and screaming profanities at Gyftrot, he dropped his homework and tried to help her into her room.

“Get off me you fucking soft cocked tool!” she shoved him away.

Correction, she head butted him away. With the force of a truck. Asgore stumbled, crashing into their fridge with a crash.

“Fuck, my brownies!” Toriel cried, falling flat on her face when she tried to scramble forward.

“Fucking shit, how the fuck am I gonna tell Muffet? Fuck she’s gonna freak out on me! We were planning to get fucked up this weekend, fuck!”

Asgore picked himself up, inspecting the damage. “Oh dear, um, my bad. I mean I didn’t mean to ruin your baking Tori. I mean we can replace the fridge, I’m so sorry about the brownies.”

Toriel wrenched the wrecked fridge door from the appliance to inspect the damage, tossing it thoughtlessly out the window. There was a distant crash and a car alarm went off.

“Suck a whimsum’s clit! Ugh, the fucking milk’s ruined them. I mean it’s not too late, I could go to Gerson’s to buy more ingredients, fuck me sideways.”

She started stumbling to the door, but Asgore caught her.

“Um, please don’t kill me, but I don’t think you should be going out like this Tori. How does this sound? I go in your place, I can pay for your ingredients. I mean it’s the least I could do.”

Toriel squinted blearily at Asgore, as if seeing him for the first time since she entered the flat. Asgore twiddled his thumbs and sang ‘Hot Cross Buns in his head.

“Yyyyeah. You DO owe me now, don’tcha?” Toriel finally slurred. She stumbled forward, and Asgore tried not to flinch away as Toriel was suddenly far closer than she had ever been in the two months they had been living together.

“Now look, don’t fuck this up. I want you to go to Gerson’s, and I want you to tell him you’re on a ‘milk run’ for me, so standard ingredients. While you’re at it pay off my tab at Grillby’s. I think I owe him some shit for property damages or something.” Toriel promptly rolled over to crash on their couch.

“T-Toriel? Are you okay?”

She cracked open a red rimmed eye.

“Well what the fuck are you still doing here fuck face? Get going on that milk run!” she screamed.

Asgore squeaked and tried not to trip over himself on his way out. Toriel had actually talked to him! He was determined not to screw up.

-

Toriel woke to the sound of her cell phone screaming about rough sex and booze. Caller ID didn’t recognise the number.

“This is Tori-fuck-with-me-and-you’re-dead-el. What the fuck do you want?”

“Tori?”

“Asgore?” Toriel sat up on the couch, when the fuck did this loser nut up enough to actually call her? Come to think of it, how did he even get her number?

“Um, I just wanted to know, did you want skim or regular?”

“The fuck?”

Toriel rubbed her head with her paws, she was too fucking post-baked for this. She could feel the hangover sapping her ability for fucks given.

“I’m at Gerson’s Groceries, I wanted to know if you wanted skim or regular milk for your brownies. Also I got granulated sugar, that’s okay right? How do you feel about pasteurized eggs?”

And then it clicked.

“As-fucker you fucking dumb nuts!”

“Ass f- I would _never-“_

“I DIDN’T WANT FUCKING LITERAL MILK FUCKFACE I WANTED SOME FUCKING JUANA YOU INCOMPENT ASS!”

She hung up, and went to dig up her joint stash.

She needed to get fucking stoned.

-

 

 

 

 

 

-

Since that day, Asgore has been trying to kiss up to Toriel’s ass. He was smitten, and Toriel took advantage of it. It was cute. In the disgustingly puppy barf was cute. He tried to win her over by ‘digging her style’. She found out he was a wuss pretty quickly.

“Hey Ass-gore, wanna join me and Muffet throw flaming turds at Hapstablooks house? I’ll even let you carry my shit!”  

When he tried disposing of it respectfully instead, she lit the trashcan on fire and kicked it down the hill.

“Hey Furfucker, wanna bake over the weekend?”

Asgore brought his mother’s cute pink mittens, and Toriel brought her re-baked ‘special’ brownies. After a confusing night, Asgore felt so bad over being a poor example for his citizens, he made normal brownies for the local kindergarteners.

Asgore felt guilty over everything. Toriel tried to get him to steal a stick of gum, only for Asgore to leave an apology note and the money he owed on the counter the next day.

She asked him to hand her pot, and he got her a terracotta flower pot. She cracked it over his head.

She went to get another piercing in her nose, and trying to impress her, Asgore volunteered to get one too. However, in the chair he started having an identity crisis and freaked out about the state of his future. He chickened out of his nipple piercing. The guy wouldn’t even go out drinking properly with her. But he still paid so what the fuck did Toriel care?

This time, they were taking him to a club. Not just any club, Dogamy and Dogaressa’s sex club. Toriel kitted up, pentagram bra, flimsy net shirt, leather tights, collar, flogger. She was gonna visit their club to dominate some punks into submission. Asgore fluffed his hair into a vague mohawke, and packed a comb in case anyone he knew saw him there.  The guy gets anxiety over a cop catching him jaywalking for Christ’s sake.

Now she wasn’t actually planning on having a wild ride, she just wanted to see Asgore squirm.

They walked into the club, Toriel waving past the line with her backstage pass. She performed after all, and Asgore trailed behind her.

“Tori I really don’t feel comfortable coming here, you said this was a club right? Can’t we just go to one of your dinky- I mean classy bars and get a drink there?”

“Don’t be such a baby, get in here.” She kicked the door open, and threw him in.

“Sup Tori?” Sans asked, lazily finishing up his knots.

“Sans you lazy ass wipe, aren’t you supposed to supervising?”

“Nah, I’m much more comfortable tying my partner up, then letting the rope do all the work. My job here is done.” He let the panting monster swing freely from the rafters.

“Remember the safe word is mustard!” he yelled up.

Toriel rolled her eyes.

She then grabbed Asgore’s shoulder and dragged him front and center from the shadows.

“Sans this is Piss Baby, Piss Baby this is Sans. Welcome to The Dog’s Den”

“Ooh, fresh goat meat? He looks green.” Sans winked as Toriel saw ASgore’s face blanch, and indeed turn a sickly green at the scene.

There was Undyne, brawling with her trainees and livestreaming the scene for her voyeuristic girlfriend, who was too shy to come out herself.

Dogamy and Dogaressa were on stage at the moment, doing a dance routine. Dogamy was slapping Dogaressa’s ass in time to the beat to the crowd’s delight.

Glyde was playing the knife game with Lesser dog, Knight Knight was making moon eyes at Shyren. Mettaton was bordering on public sex with Burgerpants in the center of the dance floor.

In other words, the usual.

“Yeah this isn’t his usual scene, he’s here with me though.”

Sans snorted. “Good fucking luck brother, Tori here’s been known to tear ball off. Hope you leave in one piece.”

Asgore gulped as they left Sans to his swinging client.

Toriel sauntered over to Muffet, Asgore followed in a slight daze at the scene of debauchery and sin, disbelieving.

“What’s up Bitch?” Toriel greeted, slapping Muffet’s ass in greeting.

“About fucking time you showed up, I was about to have to cover your shift.” Muffet knocked back her hard spider cider.

“Oh, you brought a guest. Hey baby, wanna go spin some webs with me behind that curtain over there? I have a collar here with your name on it, and I’m sure Toriel has told you all about how much I love nice, long, thick, heavy meat.” She snapped her fangs by Asgore’s face, as he stepped back blushing and rapidly rubbing at his face as he looked to Toriel with pleading eyes.

“Lay off Muffet, don’t traumatize the fluffy baby, I need him to pay for my liver transplant when I eventually OD.”

“Tori, I keep telling you to be careful, if you’re so worried you’ll need medical fi-“

“Hush.”

Suddenly, there was the feathered tip of Toriel’s flogger at his lips.

“I didn’t invite you here to talk.”

“Okay who the fuck let Jerry in here?” Sans popped up. Toriel wasn’t sure how he did that, showing up in places when they had just passed him moments before in another room, heading in a different direction. He held up the troublesome party crasher in question, who was tied up in some of his nylon ropes.

“I was just looking!” the annoying monster wailed, clawing for freedom.

“You’re fucking banned Jerry, or did you forget that last time I drop kicked you out onto the curb? Don’t make me get nice Toriel here to roast your ass, trust me your ass wouldn’t survive”

Toriel set her hands aflame and clenched her hands in a fist, making a shoving motion into her other hand which made a small ‘o’.

*Jerry ran away.

“Say Asgore, you look like a handful. Why don’t we take shots to test your mettle?” Sans asked.

“O-oh no I can’t. I have to remain vigilant and maintain composure as future ruler of this land … which I suppose would include this establishment … um-“

“So you should sample the culture of the people you’re gonna rule one day right? Come on Asgore, one little round with me in the back room. Come on, I’ll even make the effort to make you come.” Sans grinned devilishly.

Asgore couldn’t seem to get a sentence out. Toriel looked in amusement as the poor goat looked furiously around trying to find something that wasn’t inherently sexual in nature before collapsing on the spot, his face a furious red.

“Well there goes my entertainment for the night. Looks like you owe me a night of fun now.” Toriel growled.

“My pleasure Ms Dreemurr.”

“Just for that I’m going to gag your yap.”

“What will you gag me with mistress? Will I still get to come fucking your cunt?”

Muffet ignored the blatant flirting going on around her, as she peered at the unconscious form below.

“I’d call him daddy.”

END

 

 

 

 


End file.
